Of Handling Two Toddlers and a Baby in the Tummy

💭  Throwback when I was 7-months pregnant.

I have to admit, I was the laziest person on earth when I was 7-months pregnant.

It isn't JUST laziness but fatigue/out-of-breath all rolled into one. 😫 😩

Sleep was very uncomfortable at night and of course, the frequent visits to the loo. 

Not to mention that the baby in the tummy, more often than not, decided that doing somersaults in the wee hours of the morning is much more fun than daytime.

I literally had to drag myself out of bed in the mornings and it was constantly an uphill battle.

Initially, I had no idea that I was pregnant as I missed my period for 2 months (it's normal for me to have irregular menstruation) and I did not suffer from any morning sickness like my previous two pregnancies.

When I started to feel queasy and tired most of the time, I decided to purchase a home pregnancy test kit. 

Source: http://m.clearblueeasy.com/digital-pregnancy-test.php

Trust me, the above brand is so easy to read especially when you encounter faded lines or trying to figure out if it's a single or double line.

Lo and behold, the test was positive. 

Hubby was ecstatic and I saw him grin from ear to ear. 😁

I was thankful that we would be welcoming a new addition to the family, yet it felt a bit too soon as our youngest was still considered a baby. 👶

I was a bit apprehensive as to how I'd be able to manage our two toddlers and being pregnant at the same time.

Our 5-yo can manage things by herself to a certain extent but our 1-yo is STILL breastfeeding (we've tried various weaning strategies but to no avail) and she's getting clingy day after day.

She doesn't like formula but would drink fresh milk out of a carton (served cold). 

She has regular meals and even snacks, possibly every 2 hours or so. 

I must confess, that taking care of toddlers and managing the household at the same time is quite a challenge, in addition to lugging that extra weight in the tummy.

I'd sometimes find myself feeling a bit faint or too exhausted even if I'd only loaded the washer with laundry.

Hubby helps out mostly and tries to bring the kids out whenever he can so that I can have my me-time (in instances when I'm too knackered to get dressed and go out).

Entertaining people at our home is definitely out of the question as the house is in a total chaos, although we try to clear toys off the floor and keep our kitchen clean as much as we can. 

On other days, I just couldn't be bothered as the kids, especially our 1-yo, tends to mess it up anyway. 

Our 5-yo would pick up the toys and try to keep the play area tidy but her younger sister would always find ways to have the toys strewn all over the floor barely 5 minutes later.

We've come to a point that we'll just have to walk around the toys and whatever stuff our 1-yo had left on the floor.

It was no fun, no fun at all. 😫

My 3rd Baby Delivery Experience (Columbia Asia Hospital Setapak)

Every pregnancy and birthing experience is different. 

I can definitely attest to that based on my personal experience which I'd love to share here for the benefit of other mothers.

Would it get any easier or better❓❓

Well, based on my personal experience, it varies and can feel overwhelming at times considering that you do not know what to expect and when it hits you, it hits you BIG❗❗

It's easier on certain things (for instance, I didn't have terrible morning sickness for my 3rd pregnancy as opposed to the previous two and was able to eat just about anything without throwing up) and challenging on some aspects (I could feel my joints becoming more loose so at times I'd have difficulty walking and I find myself being exhausted / fatigue / out of breath throughout the entire third trimester).

THE SIGNS

As I was about to hit my 38th week pregnancy for my third child, I started noticing a few of these signs below:

* Baby "drops" / "lightening" - 
I could feel my tummy shift slightly downwards, allowing me to have some breathing space. I no longer have trouble breathing or feeling out of breath so this was very much needed.

* Pressure in pelvic area - 
I literally had difficulty walking around and was waddling instead. The pain would come and go so if I happen to be walking outside, I'd have to alert my husband to slow down and I'd be dragging both feet as he held my hand for support. If I really couldn't take the pain, I'd find a chair to sit. Needless to say, I would rather stay home during this period than go out, even though I was dying to stay active towards the end of the 3rd trimester. 

* Vaginal discharge - 
I did not have any vaginal discharge for the entire 36 weeks of pregnancy but as I hit my 37th week into my 38th, I had some form of discharge which was slightly thick, odourless and whitish in colour. 

* Tightening of tummy -
The tummy tightening happens several times throughout the day but there was no pain in the lower abdomen area so I didn't think that they were contractions. To help ease the discomfort, I would either drink warm water, sit down and take deep breaths (the deep breathing used when during labour to ease the contraction discomfort).

* Sleepless nights - 
I just couldn't sleep at night, felt very much awake and I had to make frequent visits to the loo. I couldn't even find the right sleeping position to get a shut-eye so I finally gave up and caught up on some TV series. Did I mention that it was such an uncomfortable experience having to change positions? It feels like my heavy tummy is giving pressure on my breathing space, limiting it, resulting in me feeling very much out of breath.

Out-of-topic - 
I had cravings for sweet things 🍰  🍩  🍪  🍫  🍦  during the two weeks leading up to my 38th week. 
Reason being was because I had this metallic taste in my mouth which I needed to get rid off. So I had chocolates, ice-cream, cakes, doughnuts and the occasional 🍜  instant noodles (which I haven't had for more than a year). 

THE ROUTINE CHECK-UP

We had already packed our luggage  and hospital bag. We've even placed most of our stuff at my mom's as I would go through confinement there.

We decided over the weekend that we would head back to my mom's on Monday evening after hubby returns from the office as we had a check-up with Dr Sharmina Kamal of Columbia Asia Hospital in Setapak on Tuesday morning.

We spent the night with the kids at mom's place and left for the hospital at 7.30am the following morning. 

It was the first time ever that we left our two kids at home 🏡   with my mom considering that we would normally bring them along to the check-ups. 

This time around, mom said that she was OK to look after the kids whilst we went to the hospital.

Registration was at 8am so I was the first in line. The doctor would normally come in around 9am++ as she would be doing her rounds in the wards prior to that so we would normally go and have breakfast.

We walked to the nearest mamak (there were a few around the hospital's vicinity) for breakfast ☕  and as we walked back to the hospital after breakfast, I was already waddling and could feel my tummy tighten so hubby held my hand for support.

We sat in the waiting area to see the doctor and I could see on their plasma screen  that I was her only patient that morning. It was quite unusual as Dr Sharmina would have the most number of patients as compared to the other doctors.

I went in to see her around 9.30am and told her about my tummy tightening and how there was pressure in my pelvic area. She said that she would scan me first and if I was comfortable, she can do a VE to see if I was already dilated. 

As we scanned, she could see that the baby's head was already engaged and it was really low. 

She advised me that she would need to conduct a VE to assess the opening of my cervix. We found out that I was already 3cm dilated and that she would need to admit me into the hospital in addition to breaking my water bag to speed up the labor process.

She also asked if I had any contraction pains, of which I replied that I only felt my tummy tightening but I felt no pain on my lower abdomen.

Dr Sharmina then said that they could check if there were any contractions by hooking me up onto the CTG which would take about 45 minutes or so.

I asked if it was possible for me to make a quick dash home so that hubby and I could collect our hospital bag and see our kids. 

Dr Sharmina advised that it would be risky considering that I was already 3cm dilated, this was my 3rd pregnancy and based on my previous two birth history I delivered quite easily.

We then agreed that it would be risky so decided to be admitted and hubby made a quick call to my mom to advise her that we wouldn't be coming home anytime soon.

THE WAITING GAME

We were ushered into the labour room and I changed into the hospital uniform before I was hooked up onto the CTG scan.

As hubby and I waited for the results, we looked at each other in disbelief. We were ecstatic over the possibility of seeing our baby soon, that same day.

I was anxious to know if I was indeed experiencing contractions which I wasn't aware of so I asked hubby to Google up on how to read the CTG scan (whilst waiting for the doctor / nurse to explain to us). 

The nurses came in and out of the room, checked up on me, we made small chat, they asked if I was OK as they also checked on the graph produced by the CTG machine. 📈

When the time was up, one nurse explained to me on how to look at the graph. True enough, I had 1 or 2 contractions every 10 minutes so they would break my water bag and I would be delivering the baby on the same day. 

Dr Sharmina came in and explained that we would wait until after lunch time for me to further dilate naturally before she broke my water bag to speed up the labour process.

Lunch 🍱  was served so I had my lunch whilst hubby stepped out of the room (as reception was poor to make any calls) to call my mom and confirm that I would be giving birth that day. 

I then performed my prayer and started pacing the room, in the hopes that I would further dilate. 

In all honesty, I was nervous to go through the process of breaking my water bag as it would be my first time. 

I guess I was more scared than ever as I do not know what to expect.

BREAKING THE WATER / "AMNIOTOMY"

Slightly after 2pm, Dr Sharmina and a couple of staff nurse (including a midwife) came into the labour room to start the process. 

Dr Sharmina was so gentle and assured me that everything would be alright (I believe she could sense my anxiety, probably through my facial expression). 

She asked my permission to conduct a VE first (I was still at 3cm) and proceeded to break my water. 

She told me to relax and take deep breaths whilst she proceeded to break my water. 

She then advised me that the staff nurse would be monitoring me and that she would be within the hospital vicinity if I needed her. 

Hubby and I waited for my labour to progress.

The staff nurse checked up on me nearly on an hourly basis and each time they came into the room, they asked if I felt any pain. 

I told them that I did not feel any pain at all. I managed to perform my prayers on the bed as I was exhausted from all the pacing in the labour room and I just sat quietly, resting. 

It was about 6pm in the evening when I was told that I would be given an IV drip to intensify my contractions (as I couldn't feel any pain). 

At this time, I was about 5cm dilated. 

Two hours passed and I was still at 5cm so they increased the IV drip dosage. 

It was around 9pm that I only started to feel the pain in my lower abdomen. I had to take deep breaths to ease the pain, at times the breathing was disrupted because the pain was overwhelming at times.

I had started to burst into tears, probably because it was such a long wait 😩  I was already exhausted and I was suffering from contraction pains which I really disliked.

The doctor calmed me down and told me that I could cry, it was OK for me to cry and that everything would be OK. I told the doctor I wasn't sure why I burst into tears, it was just uncontrollable.

Dr Sharmina told me that I was overwhelmed with emotions at this stage but there is nothing to be ashamed of and she told me to just cry it out.

At 10pm, the pain became more intense and the doctor and staff nurse immediately set up the room to receive the baby. However, at this point I was only 9cm dilated and the doctor advised me against pushing if I had the urge to push as she wanted to avoid any serious tearing on my Miss V.

That one hour or so wait with everyone in the labour room was something which I would not be able to forget for the rest of my life. 

Not only were there painful contraction pains (which I really did not like and wish that it would only be for a short while), I was sweating AND shivering cold at the same time. 

My entire body was shaking, my hands and feet were icy cold and the staff nurses were concerned. 

They covered me entirely with a few layers of blankets and the doctor advised them to keep me warm as she could see that I was shivering badly. They even brought over the infant warming unit, elevated my bed and adjusted the warming unit near my body. 

Whilst the staff nurses were trying to keep me warm, hubby helped to wipe off sweat already trickling down my neck, face and forehead. 

The staff nurses were quite puzzled with how I could feel cold AND warm at the same time.

They even provided me with continuous supply of warm water and hubby was right by my side giving me the water.

Only after they had set this up, I could feel myself getting warmer, however I was still shivering but not as violently as before.

It was a long one hour wait in my life to wait for the opening from 9cm to 10cm.

I was already grabbing my hubby on his shoulder when the pain became to intense. He held my hand throughout the entire ordeal.

When I could not take it any longer, I told Dr Sharmina and she then proceeded to conduct a VE and said that I was already 10cm so I could push.

I wish I could tell you that it was an easy process like my previous two births. 

For my first delivery, I pushed three times and the baby came out. As for my second baby delivery, I pushed effortlessly pushed two times (didn't really take any effort, to be honest) and the baby literally slid out. I couldn't believe it was that easy.

I thought that the more children you have, the easier it would get. I was wrong.

It took me several attempts (I lost count) to push out the baby.

The baby just wouldn't come out. 😭

However, I had the doctor, staff nurses and my hubby cheering on me, telling me that they could see the baby's head already.

Unfortunately, I felt as if I had no energy left and I asked one of the staff nurses if she could help me push the baby from my tummy (which she replied that it could not be done, of course).

It took awhile. I told the doctor a few times, "I can't do this anymore" and she continuously encouraged me, telling me that "You're doing a really good job, you can do this".

All I could think about was the pain and wondering why it was extremely difficult for me to push the baby out, wondering if I'm doing it all wrong.


Dr Sharmina performed another VE just to check on the baby and guess what, apparently the baby turned his head at the very last minute, making it difficult for me to push him out. 

Dr Sharmina helped ease the baby and I gave it my one final push. 

The baby finally came out and I felt like my energy had been drained to the very last one. 😫

I couldn't help but cry. 😭

It was such a beautiful moment as hubby was by my side the entire time. 💖

Dr Sharmina and her team congratulated 🎊  🎉  us and as hubby and one nurse fussed over the baby to clean him up and check his vitals, the other two nurses attended to me.

I am so grateful that I met Dr Sharmina for our third baby and the team of nurses at Columbia Asia Hospital Setapak were wonderful.

I've gone through easy deliveries and this one was my toughest.

I can only imagine how other women deal with challenging births and I have nothing but respect for them. 🙌

Our 3-month old Baby

Our 3-month old baby boy 👶  is very different from his two elder siblings.

He is quite an easy baby and only cries when he wants to sleep or whenever his diaper is soiled.

We've started him on formula 🍼, to top-up the breastmilk, as he drinks quite a lot.

❗I couldn't afford to nurse him around the clock considering that we have two other kids under 6 years of age. 

Our second daughter was exclusively breastfed so I spent every waking hour nursing her and cuddling her. 

Thank goodness at that time our eldest daughter was quite independent so I needn't worry much about her in terms of her meals or entertaining her.

Hubby is able to feed the baby when I need my rest. 

I'm also able to task my eldest daughter to feed her little brother when I need to do chores around the house or when our second daughter needs my attention (most of the time).

Our baby boy is the only one who sucks his thumb and we find him able to soothe himself either just to calm down or when he wants to fall asleep. 

🎉  He never ever cries at night. 

When he fusses in his sleep at night, he would suck his thumb profusely and I know that he needs to feed. 

I guess I've been trained to wake up every other hour with my first two that I tend to do the same with my third, though he doesn't really need it.

We provide him with formula once in the morning and once in the evening, breastmilk is offered in between. 

He is such a happy baby 😇  chilling and relaxing most of the time and is all-smiles when he's awake. 

The only person who cries A LOT would be his second big sister. 😓

At times, hubby and I would be baffled with her cries, not knowing why she'd cry in the first place.

We're guessing that the baby is super easy to look after considering that we need to give our full attention to our second daughter. 

Hoping that this wouldn't last for long as she has begun to increase her vocabulary and is able to express her needs and wants, minimising her meltdowns. 😅